Hey, you! Yes, you! You know who you are. You were homophobic before. You were a bigot. You were prejudicial. I mean, how couldn’t you be — when the first memory you had of being ‘gay’ or anything deviant was that it was bad? I’m here to tell you, it’s okay! It’s fine. I have been where you were before. Head full of judgments to people I have never even met — wishing I knew better. My first experience with the word ‘gay’, ‘bakla’, or ‘bayot’ was that it was bad. It was a bad thing to be any of those things. I had no idea why. I didn’t know what it meant to be ‘gay’ but somehow it was instilled within me that it was a bad thing and I shouldn’t be such. It was weird. But I was at a very impressionable age back then, so I just went with it, believing that being gay was bad. Spoiler Alert: It isn’t. So imagine my shock and surprise then when I had to go through my self-discovery journey and realize I was gay. It was harsh. I felt wrong. It was disturbing. I have learned all my life that being gay was bad without ever knowing what it meant. And now that I know what it means to be gay, I have realized that I am. I am gay. I had to go through that painful journey of self-denial and self-doubt just to make sure that I wasn’t gay — because hey, it was bad. Right? Isn’t it? It’s not. What I’m trying to say is that for anyone out there who has suppressed feelings of homophobia, wishing they knew better and were better informed before, you’re not alone. There are a lot of us. Growing in a somewhat uninformed and prejudicial environment, it’s normal. But, whatever or whoever you may be right now, I hope you find the courage to live your truth — knowing to yourself that you are valid and loved no matter what. I hope some time you can realize the truth within you because nothing feels better than knowing and living who you truly are.
-Anon