Original Title: HARD TO SWALLOW PILL: MY KID IS QUEER (An Open Letter to the Parents of Queer Children)
To the parents who have long taken due of accepting their queer children, it takes time to get out of your own nightmares, and you are beyond brave if you had done it. I want to start by saying that having a queer child does not make you less of a parent or guardian. This does not reflect and is not a basis of how good your parenting is, because the moment you started to understand the experiences of your child in a queer community, you are already doing the job well. I know that you compromise this acceptance by telling others how good your queer child is. "Bakla man yan, pero matalino." "Tomboy man, pero top 1 yan." And you should not, because the identity of your children should be imposed as a negative trait, and you could embrace it by using "at" instead of "pero". "Bakla yan at matalino." "Tomboy yan at magaling." Do your children proud as they did to you. Days are not perfect for I heard your tears, your complaints, but this is not a disease. Your children are not mentally challenged. They are norm-challenged and sometimes, you are part of their hardships to even accept themselves. You sometimes eat the becoming of the norm to make them as how you wanted them to be, and no, you should guide them as they choose their paths. You should let them be, the things they wanted to be for your goal is to lead them to happiness, as how they have given you this the day they were born. "Walang magulang ang nakatitiis sa anak." We have long believed in this saying, and it is one of those quotes I have loved in our country. As you travel yourself to the journey of the possibility of acceptance, of embracing, you are not just opening yourself to the community, you are opening closets of beauty. We often associate coming out to our queer children, but why won't we ask our parents to come in to our community? For as they come in, they would understand us and these loved people are going to embrace and accept us wholly. You might not get it from your blood-related family but home is not just a place, it could be everywhere. We are everywhere. We are your family. We hear you, parents and guardians. It is a "hard to swallow" pill, but remember, medicines which are hard to swallow better ourselves. This may be hard for you to intake but believe me, it will heal all wounds as you embrace the love your queer child is offering. We love you and we wait for you to come in.
-MK, a gay teacher from Valenzuela City
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