Original Title: An Open Letter to Closeted People Like Me Who Live in Non-Accepting Communities
I have been putting up with my conservative and religious family for very long now. I haven’t come to terms with my bisexuality until last year. I accidentally came out to them in October, and they told me I was just confused, so I went back into the closet and am closeted until now. I don’t have any plans of coming out anytime soon but can’t wait for when I can do so safely. For now, I have to put up with them saying bad things about the LGBTQ+ community daily. Not a day goes by without them noticing the space between my fingers and the space between my thighs. Telling me to sit “properly” or to stand “properly.” Telling me that the tone in which I talk was gay. I just had to understand that they’re doing this out of love for me. They criticized the way I moved and spoke because they didn’t want me to get hurt. But that still wouldn’t change the way I am and the people I love. I stay proud to be bisexual in my heart (not loudly, of course) because love is not a choice. I found communities on discord and made many friends that support me where my family can’t. Despite this, things have been really hard for me in my home this quarantine. Being closeted for the past months with a homophobic family has been taking its toll on me. In fact, ever since October I have been depressed about it. Aside from my family, my school is conservative and not really LGBTQ+ friendly. It’s just been so hard to accept that we aren’t really accepted in society. I’ve been breaking down a lot and even hurt myself at one point. I’ve been feeling very worn and find it hard to get out of bed in the morning. But still, I get out of bed in the morning. Love is not a choice, but when you can, choose love. I will keep trying to stay positive. I chose to love my life. I will not destroy my body. I chose to love my body. I will not hate my family for their concern and their views on sexuality. I chose to keep loving them and keep praying for them. I will not turn away from my religion because I’m bi. I chose to keep loving God. I will not be ashamed of my sexuality. I chose to love myself. I write this letter for someone who needs it. I chose to share my love with you. That for me is pride. That is what keeps me going. When I plant love I feel good and proud inside. Even when the world is full of hate, choose to love. You are loved, so share it with others. Hang in there, hang on to what you love, and always choose love. You’re part of the LGBTQ+ family and here, you 're loved. I’ll be praying for you. Stay proud. Happy pride month.
-Anon
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